You know how people shamelessly ask for money ALL the time on the internet. You know, for non-important things like saving children's lives or a bunch baby seals and panda bears? Yeah, you know the types!
Well, have I got something for you! I have now hopped right on this train and I too am going to ask complete strangers to donate a penny or two!
Guess what this year is?!? That's right, bitches! My 10 year class reunion. We are going to be doing up big J e double s style and eating a buffet full of wonderful things of the Italian food group AND many of us seeing each other for the first time in a decade. Some of us have preferred it that way too!
Of course I am taking up collections from the class, but as most people are in their late 20's, they are poor and have to wait until they can save up that $25 per person. And SOME of these crazy people went off and got married and now have to pay $50!
Here is what I can guarantee if you donate:
1. Jesus will shed a tear of joy for you. I went to Central Fellowship CHRISTIAN Academy for CHRIST SAKE.
2. People will get drunk and make complete asses of themselves. This is because we went to Central Fellowship CHRISTIAN Academy and everyone is very anxious to show how bad-ass they have become and as usual, this will involve slamming shots and chugging beers as quick as possible.
3. REALLY GREAT pictures AND stories of people you don't know and don't even CARE about!! WOW!
4. A virtual high five from me and a HUGE virtual hug from me as well! Seriously, do you need anything else?
5. I will make the effort to go and find as many embarrassing photos as I can from my high school days, scan them and post them here for your viewing pleasure!
OK, I am done with THAT list. Basically you get NOTHING to donate. Not a damn thing. Me and my class however, we will be able to properly tip the wait staff and MAYBE get a DJ. Yep, again, nothing for you.
Oh wait!...
6. Your karma will totally ROCK.
As you may (or may not) be aware, you do NOT need a Pay-Pal account to donate. Those of you that think it would be hilarious to donate 1 cent...I too think it would be funny. DO IT! Anyway, if you click on donate, it will take you to a log in page...just left of where you put in your e-mail and shit is a place that says: "Don't have a PayPal account? Use your credit card or bank account (where available). Continue" Clicker-poodle on that if you don't wanna use your Pay-Pal. Thanks, you're a doll!
Now go tell EVERYONE!
