I admit that there are dangers to smoking. Why, just this morning, I burned my crotch, my finger, the seat of the car and smudged my mascara. (because I was wincing in pain and the shit was still freshly put on) I am not sure how it all happened, I think I hit a bump, because I was driving the Jeep, which is also a manual, and I think in the middle of me bringing the cigarette to my lips to do the hand to lip transfer, the cig got stuck on my fingers, due to sticky left behind from the product I put in my hair just 5 minutes before, and my lips were not prepared for the extra resistance of said hand to lip cigarette transaction in conjunction with the bumpy terrain, resulting in a fire crotch (not the Lindsay Lohan kind), burned appendages and soot’d upholstery. And this was all before I even got to work!
Me and my Momsly had this convo via e-mail the other day…totally cracked me up…
(Mom is trying to get me to switch cell phone companies because she feels as though Sprint screwed her over and no one should EVER use their company for cell phone service. I have been with Sprint for over 10 years)
Consider what you are paying for your plan, contract etc. I mention it because Verizon gives you up to 5 phones (free good phones), and each person would pay roughly 25 per month for their unlimited text and 1400 shared minutes (or more) and free Verizon to Verizon, etc. So if you got 5 people to join in, it could be a good deal. The four of us never use up our 1400 minutes. Just a thought for future times.
Sprint sucks,
Love mom.
(First of all, where does Mom think I am going to find 5 people who A) want to change their plans B) doesn’t already have a contract with another cell phone company C) would be trustworthy enough to actually pay their bill to me every month?!? Ahhh, tis a good planet my Mother lives on)
Right now I pay $50 a month for everything...Joe [my boss] pays a portion of my bill since some of it is work related. I get 1500 minutes, text, pix, e-mail and all the good stuff (that I never really use, except the text part)
Sprint is still my friend,
Love,
Me
Well, sometimes you have to alienate your friends. When they jerk you around, take advantage, screw you over then threaten you, it's time to dump their butts. I have a new friend. I love my new friend and your friend still sucks - like Sears sucks. Guess that makes them searsuckers. Yeah, that was funny and you know it.
[blah blah blah about saving money on cell phone]
Building new friends daily,
Love mom.
The salutations were what were cracking me up the most…that and searsuckers!
My Mom hasn’t stepped within 100 yards of a Sears in 27 years. Apparently when she was pregnant with me they made her go out and take her tire off her Volkswagen Bug and bring it in and then they would fix it. I dunno, I usually tune out the story, but all the same, the woman has blacklisted them like no other I know!
My Mother should also become a salesperson for Verizon…apparently she is quite happy with them…you know, until next month…
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