My day started at 5:30 in the morning…I had to take Krystal to the airport as she is gone to L.A. for a week. I came back home and cat napped for about an hour and then got up to start the day. Called Larkin about 9:45 and went and picked her up around 10:30. We parked at the office and walked about 20 blocks and met up with some friends of mine who had roped off an area in one of the squares.
First things first – find beer. So we did. We deposited our warm beer into a cooler and extracted two cold beers. This was my breakfast! The parade was really nice. I think my favorite part is when anyone in the military comes by the women (and sometimes men!) put on really, really red lipstick and run out and kiss them! The marines were the funniest as they never broke form or even cracked a smile!
Reviews from the parade:
I want this truck.
I want this horse.
and this mullet wins my vote!
Larkin also did a mini-keg stand – except she wasn't on her head and it was the cutest little keg ever. I took one too, but I don't have a picture of it. Perhaps Amy does. (AMY! DO YA?!?)
The parade ended at 1:00ish and we headed back to the car – nice morning buzz off my morning meal replacement beer. We decided we were gonna need a cab – so we called Roger E. Walker, our strip club cabbie and he came and got the crew from the house.
By this point Christine and Justin had made it into town from Macon and Paul came too so we all loaded up in the cab. There was a newlywed couple that was already in the cab when we hauled up…just married since the 9th of this month. Isn't that sweet? NO! GAG PUKE and BLAH. I'm not bitter.
We get downtown and that takes a hot minute cause there are, oh, I don't know, 700,000 people in our way!!! Anyway, we get down there and wait in line to purchase our wrist bands for $5. That was a good 45 minute wait. I took this picture to commemorate. We finally get in and we get some pizza, cause I really was in need of some food by this point - I was experiencing my first of two hangovers in one day.
We found ourselves some really big frozen Bahama Momma's and drank those. I think they forgot to put the alcohol in them. SO, we went to a favorite bar of mine – called The Bar Bar (isn't that cute?) and THERE we found The Captain and also the joy of lots more beer, Sex on the Beaches, Long Island Ice Teas, Vodka and Red Bull and more beer!!! OH and a Kamikaze shot for me! Also I danced and I sang with Christine – even though it looks like I am doing some kind of Tarzan mating call thing, I am really singing about getting low and shaking my salt shaker.
Some random guy wanted to take a picture with us…please note Christine's face. HILARIOUS!
We then proceed to go BACK down to River Street where it is more crowded than a fat man's nuts and get a corn dog and some nachos! This is where I ran into Lauren!! She called and I let her know I was in front of a big ship…turns out she was in front of the same big ship! WOW! ::jump up and down and scream like cheerleaders that just saw Orlando Bloom::
We THEN go to Malones to meet our high school friend Jenn – where we can't get in cause all of the stupid people are in my way. We get Jenn to come to us and say hi and then make our way back to see if we can get back into Bar Bar. We couldn't. So we tried to go to Club One but the cover was $20!! WTF! That is like two 30 packs of Keystone! We decided then we needed to call Roger E. Walker Texas Ranger (thanks Christine for the add-on to the name…SO FUNNY) and head back to the house to find somewhere else to get our groove on.
Roger picks us up and a few miles down the road some guy is walking in the middle of the road apparently trying to hail a cab, but about to accomplish being run over. Anyway, Bubba gets in the cab with us (thankfully we are in a van cab) and he had himself some weed beads (as Christine says) and ALOT of alcohol! Wow, that dude was DRUNK. He was slurring everything. The conversation was something like: Heyz, ineedz togets to JA-hony Harrissesss (that is Johnny Harris Restaurant for those that don't speak drunk) and he gave us his whole history – he joined the marines right out of high school and he hasn't been back to South Carolina but three times since then (to which I replied that he wasn't in South Carolina NOW – I just wanted to make sure he knew that) and that he and his friend got spit up downtown. He asked us if we had been down there (dude, wow, YA THINK! Do ya see the beads…oh wait, probably not…so we just went with it), yes, we have. "Wellz thens you cun seee how you can get splitst up." Yes, yes, we understand. Roger dropped us off first and then Bubba Drunk to Johnny Harris's. I hope he made it home safe!
We went and drank some more after that…and then I had to pass out about 1 AM. Just couldn't go anymore…but I was so proud of my body for hanging in there that long!
And that, my dears, though not full of crazy weird entertainment, was our weekend. We had a BLAST!
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