Wednesday, May 9, 2007

Cinco de Mayo Blog!

Cinco de Mayo – what is it? We American's don't really know nor do we care. I always thought it meant "Margarita Specials at Your Local Mexican Restaurant" day. Apparently 4,000 Mexican soldiers smashed the French and traitor Mexican army of 8,000 at Puebla, Mexico, 100 miles east of Mexico City on the morning of May 5, 1862.

Whatever.

Anyway, we celebrated in true "us" fashion. Me, Krystal, Brian, Christine, Angel, Justin, Liz and Trish were the participants and our drinks of choice were margaritas, jager bombs, beer and cranberry long island ice teas. It started about 5:30 for some – Krystal and I got there about 7:00 and the rest of the crew came in a little after that.

There was this strange old guy that just kept walking around and so I finally got a picture of him…you know the old "Hey, Trish, pose for me" ploy and then you really take the picture with the focus on your unsuspecting target. Yeah, that is what I did. The average age range at this event was 25-45 I would imagine…and this dude was OBVIOUSLY NOT part of that group. I think he was scoping him out a hottie.

Last year at Cinco Amy took a fabulous picture of herself, Curry and me in a porta potty. This year Amy suggested (though absent from the festivities) that I get another picture. So I got two. The first is of Krystal, myself and Christine. I utilized the stand in front and let me hold your waist while I pee method which works quite nice. We had some strange stares as we exited the portalette – I am sure we looked like a clown car. The second was me, Brian and Krystal…we upped that ante on this one…including a male in our picture and all. We didn't get any stares when we came out of the potty that time though…I think everyone was too drunk to notice. Not to mention that is one of my top 10 worst photographs...geeezus.

There were quite a few bands there this year, but our favorite is McFly – they are an 80's cover band. I sang my heart out. I haven't decided if I am going to post THOSE videos yet because by singing I meant to say screeching in a drunken manner. Damn do I sound good in my head though. At some point in time…I do believe during Journey's - Don't Stop Believing, the lead singer ended up on El Azteca's roof.

Onward…SO Krystal, my lovely, innocent Krystal, had this magnificent plan that after I got back from the bathroom that she was going to throw ice and water from our beer buckets alllll over me. Precious one she is. What resulted was this picture followed by this reaction after said person tried to apologize. Have I mentioned that tequila makes me mean? It does make me a little mean. I am fun, but say you did something like pour ice cold water on me…I might do something like take my cigarette and burn you with it…twice. I tried to make the excuse that you fight fire with water so I fought water with fire, but that didn't fly, so I guess all I can say is I am sorry…but the scar will fade in time. You will come to love it…and also not to throw ice and cold water on me anytime soon.

I stole another HUGE inflatable Corona bottle. Those things are like 7 feet tall I swear. Ok, maybe just about 6'5", but I tell ya, it is tough to be a klepto in a crowd that big. I did it though. This year's is different because the inflatable Corona bottle had a palm tree complete with coconuts on it! It was amazing…and amazingly hard to deflate while drunk and in a crowd of people…but I did it.

The night went well and as we started packing up to leave some ASSHOLE decided to walk through the crowd spraying pepper spray. Really…seriously, MATURITY anyone?! I pretty much thought my throat and nose was going to evaporate, but we all survived.

And that was Cinco de Mayo. Please notate below in the comments section if I missed anything important
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